Personal Leadership
What should we be saying to our friends right now – how about this – “I believe in you; I believe in your abilities — and I believe in our friendship. I want you to know that no matter how hard the days ahead are; I will be there for you and we will get through them together.”
There will be difficult days ahead, that much is certain. I believe acting with integrity is critically important, I believe being empathetic, honest, and thoughtful represents the best clearest way through the uncertainties we face right now.
We need to encourage each other to act as friends. Friends who try to see themselves in the circumstances of those we seek to support. Before we rush counsel. Friends who listen more than they talk. Friends who reserve judgment. We need to mentally ask ourselves, “What do our friends need from us right now?” Do they need us to simply sit quietly by in a physical demonstration of our care and support? Or do they need us to “lift” them up with words of encouragement or direct action?
With all of the craziness of the world right now, on the macro level the politics, the economy, the virus and the mutations – and more intensely perhaps on the micro or personal level. The day-to-day challenges just normally associated with family and life are increasingly overwhelming. When complicated by work and school, sheltering in place, not sheltering, wearing personal protection equipment, not wearing it – then perhaps doubled again with the anxiety created by the synergy of the macro level and personal level intersections. It is no wonder that more and more of our friends and neighbors simply need someone they can trust. Someone to just remind them that it will be alright, and we will get through it.
It will be hard to remain or become a good friend in the difficult days ahead. I’m already finding it hard. Hard because I am also struggling with the same macro and micro level problems. Yet, when I am honest about my circumstances, when I am truthful with myself, I know that I have it better than most. I’ve got a roof over my head. I don’t worry about mortgage payments or past due rents. I have clean water and I’m not worrying about my next meal. I have my health and I have friends who are there for me (most of the time). So, while its hard, why not me, how can I be so selfish that I don’t act on opportunities to be a friend. My problems pale in comparison to most people on this planet. Being a better friend is the least I can do. It is probably the least anyone reading this blog post can do.
Today a lot of people are throwing around a quote that goes something like this – when you know better, do better. Maybe another spin on that is – when you know what friendship looks like, be a better friend.
There will be difficult days ahead, that much is certain. Days when we all need friends. But for today, it’s time for me to be a friend and create moments of real happiness in others, provide a time for healing for those in need, and act in a way that brings better days for all of us.
