What does “do better” mean?

What does "do better" mean? Does it mean working together for a common goal in a fair way? Does it mean that doing something important together is more satisfying than doing it alone? Does being better mean that we see and appreciate the worth of others, not just acknowledge it? Does it mean giving those who make mistakes some understanding and not immediately judging or criticizing them? Does it mean sticking to who we are while using better ways that benefit everyone, not just some of us?

 I think we can and must “do better.” I believe it begins with personal integrity, demonstrated through daily demonstrations of honesty and responsibility. Each of us must relentlessly tell the truth, not “situational or relative” truth but a real and commonly held, principle-based truth. Truth that is clearly observable to the trained and untrained eye.  Leaders must seek the truth in others as well – giving those that would hedge the truth the grace to come clean. 

 I believe setting clear expectations with others and holding to those expectations promotes responsibility. When team members and others know who you really are and what you honestly expect. This personal connection to what is expected creates an environment in which accepting tasks and responsibly delivering high-quality results becomes the norm and doing better becomes more than a phrase – it becomes a way of work.

Dialogue and an appetite for a conversation focused on improvement are central to the effort to “do better.” Whether it’s in our personal lives or our professional lives – talking with and not at others is central to establishing shared values and beliefs. Conversation is at the heart of inspiration and sharing a sense of mission, of accomplishing something larger than self. 

 Creating an organization that is honest and willing to hold conversations about important matters will lead to a more positive work culture. Organizations that talk about important matters create virtuous cycles that reinforce the positive elements within an organization focused on next-generation success.

 Organizations where people feel engaged, motivated and invested – where the culture is nurturing and supportive are ultimately more successful in the short and longer-term. 

 Many of you have experienced work or personal life moments where the environment was incredibly positive – where the culture was rich, where everyone was united in purpose and focused on the task or tasks at hand. For many of us, it’s why we chose to continue on the journey into the executive leadership – to create spaces where real and important work can be done. 

It is a culture which allows strategy.

Leaders who aren’t tuned into the culture of the workplace do so at their own peril.

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It’s called leadership.

Just because someone carries it well doesn’t mean it isn’t heavy.

Up to this point, we have talked about what may have been an unexpected fall from grace in your career, we’ve talked about the causes – those that were unintentional and those that may have been intentional. 

We have talked about the emotional and physical damage losing a job or position can have on you. We have talked about the personal and professional repercussions that the fall from grace delivers oftentimes with vengeance. If you’ve experienced this disappointment on a large or small scale, you know how devastating it can be. If you haven’t – well thanks for staying with me and I hope you have learned how best to avoid the “fall.” I hope you have also learned that those who have tumbled from the pedestals of leadership …  don’t always show their true feelings to the world for a variety of reasons but tumbling from the leadership pedestal always hurts – sometimes badly. 

Setting aside the instant trauma of not knowing what’s next, you begin to reflect on some deeper wounds - the years advancing in your field of expertise and working long days and nights to achieve success now taken, the sacrifices demanded and the dues one pays to become a leader now wasted. Few leaders that I know; know that the end is near – leaders by their very nature are problem solvers, they are fixers and optimists even in the most dire of circumstances believe that they can fix what is wrong or has gotten off track so being caught-off guard and sometimes blindsided by an unanticipated and unprovoked career assault can be devastating – leaving even the strongest leaders weak-kneed and both mentally and emotionally spent. Yet for most leaders, the characteristics that enabled their rise to a position of leadership – grit, resilience, perseverance, stamina, hard work and integrity are the secret sauce that compels them to rise again. To get up and face the challenges and indeed the challengers again. You regain your bearings, pick yourself up, and tend your business, it’s time to start thinking about what’s next. Where do you go from here?

 Being positive in a negative situation is not naïve. It’s called leadership.

 As you evaluate the circumstances that led to your fall from grace, it’s not only prudent to assess your personal and professional conduct to see if anything needs to be changed, it is the wisest course of action. The leader who doesn’t see this as an opportunity for growth is bound to live it again. There are few among us who couldn’t benefit from the opportunity to redo a few of the situations life has handed us. 

Begin by taking a close look at your sense of self and make the needed adjustments. For example, if you feel insecure as a result of recent events, take steps to rebuild your confidence by accepting a lead role in smaller community activities or business events. If you feel slighted and unappreciated, honestly think about why you feel that way – did you not give the initiative your best effort or treat others the way you would have wanted to be treated? You might even consider why you need others to validate your actions and contributions. 

Consider too, what your peers and colleagues have said in their criticism of you, particularly regarding your leadership skills. Honestly consider what others have said. Acknowledge that even when your intentions were pure, words and actions can unconsciously come across in different ways to those around us. Maybe you honestly believed your leadership style was direct and focused; while some of your colleagues interpreted your actions as abrupt and dismissive. Sometimes we say and do things in ways that make sense to us but we miss the target with others, who interpret us differently. And that gives us an opportunity to improve as a leader.

Examine the strength of the link between you and your best self – are you the still the honest person you were, do you still work hard and contribute to positive outcomes, do you act with integrity? Do you project confidence in difficult moments and do you persevere? If you answer these questions positively – you’re on your way back to leading meaningfully again.

 Acknowledge the disconnect between intention and action to decide how to bridge it in future interactions.

 It’s all too easy to get bogged down in disappointment and self-criticism, but don’t let negativity rule your life – take charge of your story and how it’s being lived. 

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